i listen. not because i want to, but because someone wants me to hear them. they want to ask me things, to offer them an opinion, they want to ensure them that the matter at hand that they speak about is going about in a normal way. if spoken to, listen. a valid point taught over and over. the objects we discuss are not necessarily what is on the other persons mind i guess, perhaps there are subjects they cannot speak about. stuff too personal, perhaps they lack the words for it, in either case they carry on and i sit patiently and listen. i try not to let my mind wander off to my own issues, i try to accompany, it is their world we share, they are me, the one who knows simply goes on with washing dishes. i listen till i do not want to anymore then i stop.

i then call and talk to others. i speak nonsense until something sticks. i talk about the day, the politics, the moods of people i do not know and the temperment of populations around me. i talk to my friends, i like when they listen, it makes my ego feel good. i know the ego is not my friend, it is not who i am but simply the thing i see when i focus attention. either way it feels good, like a candy bar. so i listen and i talk.

one day we will all go to sleep and never wake up. what will that be like? no more worries, no more listening or talking. our stuff will all go to someone else like going bankrupt in monopoly. i suppose it probably will be alot like waking up after never going to sleep. we just arrived, had this room, moms and dad and siblings, clothes on our back and food in our belly. and it grew from there.