the noise that occupy our minds and the issues that drag on us are an everyday occurrence. recently this noise seems to have increased, always humming in the background, brought about by the disconnect my world seems to be in. through it all is a sense of contentment. like a bird caught in the rain, all one can do is lower their head and push through it. past the ongoing summer, the increased humidity, the stories of murder and mayhem in the news, all around me cracking paint and dusty floors.
from the mirror i begin to see the wrinkles forming. coupled with grey hairs…I notice a fade in my normal complexion. i stare longer then needed while forgetting why i even began an exercise of self reflection. we all face these seasons in our life, with storms coming and going. as the clouds gather I think to myself where in the storm I might be. Rains are good I tell myself, imaging the silver etching of the clouds, if these moments can be enjoyed I have solved it all. if i can enjoy the fall, the cracks, the impossibility of it never getting younger, freer, better, then i too can become that beauty you see in the fall leaves, when everything is dying but also most beautiful.
a world of poles, surrounded by waves where we manage the troughs. constantly being pulled one way or the other, between good and bad from happy and sad. the world itself creating the balance we all seek. pulling us from one ay to the other, from young to old and through good and bad. each step, each action, creating a logical reaction that swings the ball to the other side or once again around the pole. best to let go and let it find it for us.
and all at once the summer collapsed into fall.
oscar wilde.