there are moments where i have been before. places that feel familiar. warm smiles that we recognize even from strangers while light breezes on an autumn day bring us somewhere where we are not. each morning as our eyes open another day greets us, parts of us, as we are coming apart and losing ground each moment. we then proceed on our days, check our messages and plan the events. everyone of us the center, like trying to point to the center of a sphere we are all it.

we will not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started.

t.s. elliot

i yearn for water. to float and bob within it, to feel the sensation of swimming for when i lift my feet from the bottom the problems seem to stay below and momentarily I am lost in it all. we push for moments like this, to pedal fast on our bike or become lost in a novel, anywhere but here in our head. escape the ego, the imaginary person we think is locked somewhere in our heads pulling the contraptions that make us talk and think and act.

and then we sleep. itself an act of sacrifice. trading our time for tomorrow, we dont know why we wake but when we do we set ahead a series of games for only us to play. we imagine a three dimensional board where we are the star player, moving forward and conquering demons and advancing stages only observed by the players that care to watch or perhaps participate. racking up points for the sake of keeping score, even though at the end they along with us will all become a memory.