at the end of the day you can look back and see if you have done anything significant. both good and bad. you can look at your time spent, judge its outcome, and go to bed feeling like you have a feather in your cap or a black eye from the day.

black eye, or feather in your cap.

at times, the day happens to you. you get a cold, a bill in the mail, or a phone call from a long lost friend. other times, you can run the day. you call your friend, you choose to make a decision such as exercise or eating something like junk food. as the saying goes, either you run the day or the day runs you.

the feelings are drastically different towards the end though. a sense of accomplishment or defeat sort of washes over you. jumping from one feeling to the other depending on how it played out. the differences from the days are quite drastic i find as well, and will change as we age or how we are feeling.

we ache. we age. we feel good then feel bad. boredom comes and hope is always a great feeling. the dreams we go after are so much better then the reality when they are achieved. we create endless problems for ourselves and over examine and worry about too many aspects of things that we cannot change and probably should not. we suffer, but we still go on.
i think it is hope and a fear of pain and the unknown that carries us forward.