Moving through us all, feelings of health and happiness dance with feelings of tiredness and moments of melancholy. We lob things into our future, plans to take us to another tomorrow. Glance around the room, peer into the car windows, all of us in a world where we believe the intent and purpose is different this time. All certain that the choices to stay or go are ours to call, instead of some predestined tiles falling. 

Through thick and through thin we all make it through each day. None of us without some ribbons to pin on our chest, and a few setbacks to keep things a balance. We span the day, keeping busy as we must. Yearning to live others lives, we go about our own, reassuring ourselves that they are the best choices we have. And they are. Luck and time had brought us here, we did not choose when and where, we did not choose our vessels but embrace them as much as we can. Life happens to us, causing scars and changes to form, we only see the other things in our vicinity, it is those we pace ourselves with. It is those we compare our growth with. 

Next to my table a couple looks exhausted. Sitting nearby, a middle-aged women smiles into the camera phone and takes a selfie. A young waiter eagerly fills my coffee cup as I look around from my own center. I am a bit confused, and feel a bit saddened at being so aware of myself. Wishing I was absorbed in taking a photo of myself or serving those around me, I feel lost. I recall my roll, my business and family, a man of everything from nothing and lean back into my role. I best stop looking I remind myself, utterly aware that no amount of telling me what I know will change the direction. We all fall forward. Like it or not. Moments and thoughts spilling out into a changing world that will forget it all as the winds come and cover it all up again.

I have realized that the past and future are real illusions, that they exist in the present, which is what there is and all there is.

alan watts.